Kelly. YOU. And she introduced me to you and all these WONDERFUL humans and that’s why I’ll always love her. In my weird ways. The side eye 😂😂 the accuracy of that. I’m so glad you enjoyed it.
She, like so many things, flourish when kept for the right reasons. Vicious when used as weaponry. I tend to lean in and bite into the countless slices of greatness served. Wickedly delicious, filling and transformationally satiating. In her I’ve found truth, love, lust, inspiration, heartbreak, the story and connections in the farthest corners of the earth. Count yourself amongst them. We’re so lucky
Ivonne. Yes. She really does. Like many of the great women to love I understand she’s not quite as simple as this or that. My opinion often changes on her, many times, over and over. While I can’t deny the shitty side of it all. I also cannot deny the immense wonder and luck to have it. Both as a human and a writer. Because I’ve found all those things too. Also you. Also smearing poetry in corners where we would never have been able to reach before. It’s complicated. And it makes for a wonderful story. I’m glad I get to tell my stories to her, for her to then shimmy into the lives of others in her pink boa, and also tell my stories. For me to then hear of stories from others, through her. And on and on.
Thank you Jeffrey! I appreciate that. And maybe, or maybe you went to the a different party and instead met the woman in the corner, beside her, a bag full of books.
Hmmm, interesting. I've been thinking about Don Quixote recently (off to see the ballet today) and perhaps that's what happened to him. Only maybe he mistook the woman in the corner for the girl in the flamingo pink feather boa? Anyway, thank you for sparking these thoughts!
Literally just stepped away from the girl in the feather pink boa until the end of the year. On Sunday, I broke up with her publicly. Literally. Bawling because I just can’t right now. The constant judgement, the rush of it all, the compulsion to be there, the identity BS etc etc etc You get it. I’m now private and only talking to my email list. Feels amaaaazing. Thank you for the lush visual of one of the most complicated, love-hate relationships we all have. 👑💅🏽💋
I absolutely understand why. It shouldn’t feel like such a hard a decision, but it really feels heavy. All the things you’ve listed - it’s like a million lane freeway. And sometimes you just need to get off. I’m so glad you and I love that it’s feeling so good. And I’m thrilled you liked this piece! It was experimental for me 🦩🦩
This read is absolutely delicious. I’ve spent the last month taking a break from her, I can honestly say the quiet has been delightful. Yet like you said, the traits we love, the ones that bring us closer to our communities - the love, knowledge & expression that bring us joy & sweeps the sour taste of her toxicity right off our tongues are the ones that will no doubt bring me back to her in another month or two. Her perks are a blessing when we don’t let her rule our lives. You laid this out PERFECTLY 💕
Madi thank you so much! I’m currently in a wild phase of experimentation so I’m glad you liked it. On social media - I absolutely understand the quiet. I often log out for weeks at a time. And the quiet is so delicious you could eat it. It may interrupt the quiet, but it brings so many riches. I guess it’s up to us to wear our boundaries like she wears her feather boa. 🦩🥂 Thank you for reading! x
To feel as though she is the death of you and yet you will die without her. Thank you for expressing this disgusting relationship so well. It hurts. And yet...
Pure poetry that captures the most modern and fraught of relationships. Thank you for following my Substack, I'm so grateful to have discovered your beautiful writing here and on Instagram too.
Kelly. YOU. And she introduced me to you and all these WONDERFUL humans and that’s why I’ll always love her. In my weird ways. The side eye 😂😂 the accuracy of that. I’m so glad you enjoyed it.
She, like so many things, flourish when kept for the right reasons. Vicious when used as weaponry. I tend to lean in and bite into the countless slices of greatness served. Wickedly delicious, filling and transformationally satiating. In her I’ve found truth, love, lust, inspiration, heartbreak, the story and connections in the farthest corners of the earth. Count yourself amongst them. We’re so lucky
Ivonne. Yes. She really does. Like many of the great women to love I understand she’s not quite as simple as this or that. My opinion often changes on her, many times, over and over. While I can’t deny the shitty side of it all. I also cannot deny the immense wonder and luck to have it. Both as a human and a writer. Because I’ve found all those things too. Also you. Also smearing poetry in corners where we would never have been able to reach before. It’s complicated. And it makes for a wonderful story. I’m glad I get to tell my stories to her, for her to then shimmy into the lives of others in her pink boa, and also tell my stories. For me to then hear of stories from others, through her. And on and on.
Great post.
I'm afraid I never met the girl in the flamingo pink feather boa. Did I go to the wrong parties?
Thank you Jeffrey! I appreciate that. And maybe, or maybe you went to the a different party and instead met the woman in the corner, beside her, a bag full of books.
Hmmm, interesting. I've been thinking about Don Quixote recently (off to see the ballet today) and perhaps that's what happened to him. Only maybe he mistook the woman in the corner for the girl in the flamingo pink feather boa? Anyway, thank you for sparking these thoughts!
Oh have a beautiful time - that sounds incredible. And maybe he did; now you’ve left me with some thoughts to churn over in my mind.
Literally just stepped away from the girl in the feather pink boa until the end of the year. On Sunday, I broke up with her publicly. Literally. Bawling because I just can’t right now. The constant judgement, the rush of it all, the compulsion to be there, the identity BS etc etc etc You get it. I’m now private and only talking to my email list. Feels amaaaazing. Thank you for the lush visual of one of the most complicated, love-hate relationships we all have. 👑💅🏽💋
I absolutely understand why. It shouldn’t feel like such a hard a decision, but it really feels heavy. All the things you’ve listed - it’s like a million lane freeway. And sometimes you just need to get off. I’m so glad you and I love that it’s feeling so good. And I’m thrilled you liked this piece! It was experimental for me 🦩🦩
This read is absolutely delicious. I’ve spent the last month taking a break from her, I can honestly say the quiet has been delightful. Yet like you said, the traits we love, the ones that bring us closer to our communities - the love, knowledge & expression that bring us joy & sweeps the sour taste of her toxicity right off our tongues are the ones that will no doubt bring me back to her in another month or two. Her perks are a blessing when we don’t let her rule our lives. You laid this out PERFECTLY 💕
Madi thank you so much! I’m currently in a wild phase of experimentation so I’m glad you liked it. On social media - I absolutely understand the quiet. I often log out for weeks at a time. And the quiet is so delicious you could eat it. It may interrupt the quiet, but it brings so many riches. I guess it’s up to us to wear our boundaries like she wears her feather boa. 🦩🥂 Thank you for reading! x
Well DAMN
To feel as though she is the death of you and yet you will die without her. Thank you for expressing this disgusting relationship so well. It hurts. And yet...
Pure poetry that captures the most modern and fraught of relationships. Thank you for following my Substack, I'm so grateful to have discovered your beautiful writing here and on Instagram too.
OH MY GOD. This is so on point. You’ve personified her so perfectly. 😭🤍
creative perfection!
Thank you for this. Brilliant.